Song Dedication for Waiting Parents

"Like bullets to my soul..."

aaron ivey

Lately I have been remembering with great intensity the feelings that accompanied THE WAIT to bring our children home. Maybe because it is National Adoption Awareness Month and there are blog posts, facebook status updates, church programs, radio announcements, etc. about waiting children. And just like for many of you, the number 147,000,000 keeps popping up-it's the highly estimated number of orphans in the world (a minute fraction of these children are adoptable by US citizens). So my mind has traveled to all the children who are waiting and then to those that have been matched with parents and to their parents waiting on the other end.

I think for parents that know a sweet face, a sad face, the shape of a nose, a dimpled hand, a runny nose that needs wiping, a known illness and so on, the number suddenly has a face and it is devastating to know that someone lumped your beloved child into a statistic used for good and for corruption.

Because to me Gannon wasn't a number:

Ruthie wasn't a number

Andrew wasn't a number

Peter wasn't a number

And the darling West African boy we loved and love wasn't then and still isn't a number.

They are OUR children.

I wasn't a good waiter and I don't think that I will ever be one to dole out wisdom on waiting though I have tried. I have had Aaron Ivey's song Amos Story playing frequently and the words describe the anguish I felt while waiting for our children. Aaron Ivey is the Pastor of Worship at Austin Stone Community Church and has been in process to bring home Amos and Story from Haiti with his wife for an extremely long time. If you have 99 cents I HIGHLY recommend downloading the song from iTunes or the entire album.

Here is the anguish in words from the first stanza and chorus:

(video of Aaron performing follows)

Another photograph to wrestle in my head

Another sleepless night on concrete feather bed

These thoughts of you like bullets to my soul

I've got to find a way to get you here

I'll find a way to get you here

if it takes my fleeting breath

another sunrise hits the ground

and its a dark lonely sight

Light years away I hope you know

there is somebody searching

for the way to get you here

I will get you here.

But those who hope in the LORD

will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint

Isaiah 40:31

To the V family waiting for M and S

the W family waiting for 2 in Ethiopia

the S family waiting for D

the H family waiting for T and G

the B family waiting for G

the L family waiting for M and L

the A family waiting for A

we are praying for your strength, hope and courage.

Tooth Fairy- Friend or Foe- You Decide

Gannon finally lost his first tooth last week. He handed it too me without any fanfare and said "Here Mom, I lost my tooth." I was hoping he would be more excited but that was such a Gannon reaction.

Ruthie promptly accosted Gannon in the playroom and this conversation ensued:

"Gannon are you really really happy you lost your tooth?"

"I guess Ruth."

"Well [make that into a 4 syllable word] do you want the tooth fairy to come?"

"I guess so Ruth."

"Gannon- Are you SURE [3 syllables] that you want a teeny tiny lady that you don't know flying around your room at night?"

"Well, I don't know now Ruth."

Hmm, that was definitely some food for thought don't you think? Gannon decided before days end that he did indeed want the tooth fairy to pay him a visit so he wrote a note with help.

And we placed the note and tooth under his pillow. Ruthie decided she would sleep under her pillow and hide her special things from the tooth fairy.

The next morning, Gannon came into our room early in the morning and said that he didn't think the tooth fairy left him a surprise and she may have even taken the tooth, which he had later requested to keep through a late night postscript on the note.

Ruthie jumped up with a very satisfied look on her face and said, " I TOLD YOU!! That is what she doos [working on tenses still]. She flies around to peoples' houses and she takes things. She is a taker."

I almost rolled out of bed laughing because she was so serious. I got out of bed and went to Gannon's room to find his package with tooth and dollar inside. He acted surprised but I can tell we have a skeptic on our hands. However, something tells me he is willing to play along for the money.

Another milestone... where does the time go?

I had to post this side by side comparison of the tooth that Peter had to have pulled with root attached on right and Gannon's tiny tooth on the left. Amazing if not a little gross.

One year at home

Can you believe Andrew and Peter have been home with us for ONE ENTIRE YEAR?

We are in disbelief.

We celebrated formally tonight but everyday is truly a celebration as we all continue to learn, change, grow and love in this happy chaotic family.

We love you Andrew and Peter.

Growing Gannon

Gannon is growing and changing. My word... I can't get over it.

He has two "wiggly" teeth.

He is starting to read.

He weighs 50 pounds.

He loves helping in the house.

And one of the newest developments is that

Gannon chose his new hairstyle and he styles it diligently

with his very own bottle

of extra hold wet look hair gel.

And it looks great!

No matter how he grows and gains new skills

he remains our sweet, cute, thoughtful and funny boy.

What Joy!

Prayer of St. Francis

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope;

where there is darkness, light;

and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love;

for it is in giving that we receive,

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

Andrew loves his bath

Before we had children I dreamed of how sweet bath time would be with one child or many.

Bath time is now a time of survival.

My goal is to avoid a flooded bathroom floor, crumbling dowstairs ceiling, soap in someone's eyes, yelling, falling in and if I am really really lucky I can get out without having to change my clothes. If I plan well and stagger baths and evening duties it isn't that bad but many nights because we are lingering in the playroom with books or enjoying the last bit of sunshine I wait until the last possible minute to "do baths." And then RJ and I bump fists stare into each other's eyes and say "Let's Do It." And we say it in a Bronx sort of accent just for fun.

Tonight, RJ took Gannon out for some special bike riding time so I had the younger three in the tub. We had plenty of time so I poured in a healthy (or not so healthy) amount of Dora the Explorer strawberry bubbles and said have fun. I was tired so I was opting for the friction method of getting clean tonight (three kids with lots of bubbles. some toys, a few bath poufs and a floating wash cloth equals clean kids without me having to enter the fray.) I sat back with my camera and had so much fun taking pictures of the kids and Andrew lit up my camera. Enjoy!

Back to School

We are blessed with patient, kind, creative and Jesus loving teachers this year. Both Gannon and Ruth are so excited to go to school each day. Andrew would love to go as well but the little boys are home with me. Peter continually keeps his eye on the door during drop off and pick up. It is a logistical challenge during drop off and pick up so I have resorted to carrying Peter on my back in my Ergo Carrier and Andrew loves to be a "teeny tiny baby" in the sling. We are quite the sight moving down the hall like an amoeba. I hope to post a picture of me carrying 2 33 month old boys soon.

Another very exciting side note is that 2 other children in Gannon's class were adopted internationally. 3 out of 12 is amazing I think. I am thankful that they share this commonality.

Here are a few pictures.